Dirty Laundry
by nerdcoast
Summary: Spoilers. Set after 5x04. Gail seeks out Holly after the last scene in the laundry room.


The knock on Holly's door took her by surprise. She stood from the couch and checked her phone for missed calls or texts on her way to the front door. Nothing. Whoever this was owed her an explanation to why they felt the need to come over unannounced in the middle of the night. She stopped short of the door, noticing the unmistakable blonde topped blob barely visible through the glass. It was Gail.

Holly took a moment to calm her nerves, completely unsure as to why Gail had chosen 11:30 at night, almost two weeks after they had last spoken, to show up at her doorstep, probably drunk. She rubbed at her tired eyes and unlocked the door. Sure enough a much deflated Gail stood before her, but she didn't seem drunk. That almost made Holly more nervous. Without a word, Holly moved aside, silently acknowledging Gail's presence and offering her entry.

Gail managed four short steps indoors before her strong façade fell to pieces. Holly quickly locked the door and eased Gail further into the house, depositing her on the same couch she had been peacefully seated on not two minutes ago. Gail wiped at her tears and shrugged off her jacket, clearly intending to settle at least momentarily in. Taking her lead, Holly reached out to close her laptop. Work could wait. The sat in silence for a moment, Holly unsure where to start, not even sure what had brought Gail over here in the middle of the night.

"I feel stupid Holly. This all..." Gail made a rather clumsy motion around the room, not really pointing anything in particular out, "…this is stupid."

Holly felt the pain in chest rise. So this was it then. Gail had come here to end things officially. She fought back the temptation to beg Gail to rethink her decision. But her love for the other woman held her back. If Gail was not happy, who was she to ask her to stay?

Gail wiped at her face again and continued. "You could get shot Holly. Through a fucking air vent. An air vent! You know that? One second you are doing laundry, and the next, POW, nothing."

Holly looked back at the other woman, trying to decipher what type of analogy Gail was aiming for now. Not able to come up with a single option, Holly allowed herself the small hope that maybe, just maybe, Gail wasn't trying to break them up for good. Her anxiety returned immediately though, realizing that something else had impacted Gail enough to bring her desperately crying and broken to Holly' doorstep after weeks of silence.

"Who got shot Gail?"

"I thought I saved her, she was fine, and then she wasn't. She just died. And that isn't the worst part Holly. I went back. To look for her keys. And this little girl came in, looking for her mom."

The pieces started to click, the woman on her table this evening, the detective at her office door looking to ID her vic…it had to be the same woman. She looked back at Gail, encouraging her on.

"This little girl, Holly, I had to tell this _child_ that she would never see her mom again, all because some asshole decided he wanted a promotion. A fucking air vent Holly! That is all it took to ruin something so important. To strip someone of the person they love."

Fresh tears slipped down Gail's cheeks. It hurt Holly too much to see Gail in this much pain. She reached out with both hands, and carefully wiped the tears from her girlfriend's face (could she even still call her that?). Soft blue eyes found hers.

"Gail, I know the world makes no sense, and what happened today is terrible, it really is. I'm sorry."

Gail simply nodded. They sat quietly for another minute before she slipped suddenly off the couch and towards the kitchen. She returned a moment later with two glasses of water, and handed one to Holly.

Gail remained standing, shuffling in place before continuing on. "I meant what I said earlier. This is stupid Holly. We can't do this anymore."

The awful sinking in the pit of Holly's stomach returned. "Gail, please."

"No Holly, just hear me out okay?"

Holly nodded.

"You could get shot tomorrow, or hell, even today, what little is left of it. I don't want to waste any more time just because we are both idiots. And you are far too smart to be this stupid Holly, and I would like to think that I am too. So, I am sorry. I am sorry that I ran out on you that night at The Penny. I should have stayed and let you explain. In retrospect, I may have overreacted quite a bit. I know you Holly, and I know that this thing between us, whatever it is, or was, it was not just having fun. I know I don't exactly come baggage free. But you are an idiot too. You never called, or text me, or came to talk to me. I know you were afraid to push me away, and that is partially my fault for that damn cat analogy, but you should have tried too. We were both idiots, and this not talking shit has to end. Because we could die tomorrow Holly, and I don't want to regret one more day of waking up without you next to me, and…"

Holly cut Gail off, drawing her down for a desperate kiss. She had heard more than enough to know that this was Gail's olive branch, and she would be a fool not to except it. She felt Gail lean in closer, returning her kiss zealously. Holly was the first to pull out, lingering in Gail's space momentarily, not willing to let too much distance in after so long apart.

"I am sorry too Gail. I should have tried to talk to you sooner. I wish I had. These past couple weeks have been miserable. I've missed you."

"I missed you too nerd."

For the first time since that night at The Penny, Holly found herself genuinely smiling and Gail smiled back at her. Holly let Gail pull her up off the couch and into her arms.

Gail buried her face against Holly's neck. "Can we just go lay in bed together?"

"Yeah. My bed hasn't been the same without you." Holly whispered before she drew Gail back to place a small kiss on her lips. Gail's warm smile returned. They slipped out of the embrace as Gail eased and still cold hand down into Holly's. They stood smiling at each other for a moment longer before Gail tugged lightly and led Holly up the stairs and into bed.


End file.
